Psychologist for Child Anxiety: Helping Your Child Build Confidence and Calm

When anxiety begins to shape your child’s life, it does not just affect them, it affects your whole family. You might notice a child who was previously carefree suddenly worrying about everyday activities like school or playdates. Perhaps bedtime has become a struggle, or your child has developed new fears that leave you unsure how to help. At times like these, turning to a child anxiety psychologist can make all the difference.

This article explains how a child anxiety psychologist supports children to manage anxiety and rebuild confidence. You will find clear signs to watch for, evidence based treatments such as cognitive behavioural therapy and play based approaches, practical ways you can help at home, and what progress often looks like over time. By the end, you will have a grounded, Australian guide to the support that helps children rediscover calm and capability.

Understanding Anxiety in Children

Anxiety becomes a clinical issue when worries are frequent, persistent, and begin to interfere with daily life at home, school, or with peers. In Australia, about 6.9% of children aged 4 to 17 experience an anxiety disorder in any 12 month period [1]. Recognising patterns early helps you act sooner and prevents anxiety from becoming entrenched.

Common anxiety presentations in childhood include:

• Separation anxiety: marked distress when apart from caregivers, excessive fears about safety or reunion, and avoidance of separations that disrupt school or activities.

• Social anxiety: persistent fear of embarrassment, rejection, or negative evaluation that leads to avoiding parties, group work, or oral presentations.

• Generalised anxiety disorder: excessive worries about multiple areas, such as school performance, friendships, health, or family finances, often paired with irritability, fatigue, or sleep disturbance.

• Specific phobias: intense, disproportionate fear of particular objects or situations, such as animals, storms, or needles, that drive avoidance and family accommodation.

When these worries persist and begin to dictate choices, a structured assessment with a child anxiety psychologist can identify the type of anxiety and tailor a clear plan forward. For a step by step overview of treatment options, see our companion explainer on child anxiety therapy.

How Child Psychologists Use CBT and Play Therapy for Anxiety

Cognitive behavioural therapy is the Australian guideline endorsed first line treatment for anxiety in children and young people. CBT helps children notice worry patterns, test anxious predictions, and practise new coping skills while gradually facing fears. Australian guidance recommends CBT to improve functioning and to target full remission of the anxiety diagnosis [2]. Large evidence syntheses show that about 49% of children achieve remission at the end of CBT when compared with waitlist or no treatment [4].

For younger children, or for those who find talking difficult, psychologists often deliver CBT concepts using developmentally friendly, play based approaches. Australian guidance supports play based methods to introduce CBT ideas and to help children engage, particularly for children under 12 or when direct CBT is initially hard to access [2][3]. In practice, sessions may include:

• Building a personalised fear ladder to break big worries into small, doable steps that feel safe and achievable [2][3].

• Therapeutic storytelling, puppets, or drawing to externalise worries so children can talk about “the worry voice” rather than feeling blamed.

• Role play to rehearse brave behaviours for school, social situations, or medical procedures.

• Calm breathing, muscle relaxation, and attention training to steady the body while thoughts settle.

Parents are involved throughout. Australian guidance encourages family participation so you can coach skills between sessions and reduce patterns that accidentally keep anxiety going, such as excessive reassurance or avoidance [2][3].

Helping Children Face Fears Safely and Gradually

Avoidance brings short term relief yet strengthens anxiety over time. Gradual exposure reverses this pattern. With a psychologist’s support, children face feared situations step by step, learning that anxiety reduces with practice and that the feared outcome rarely occurs. This approach is central within CBT and is recommended in Australian clinical guidance for paediatric anxiety care [2][3].

A typical pathway for a child who fears dogs might look like this:

1. Look at photos of calm dogs while practising slow breathing and helpful self talk.

2. Watch a friendly dog from a distance in a park while rating the level of anxiety.

3. Stand closer for a short time while noticing anxiety rise and fall.

4. Briefly pat a calm dog with the owner’s consent and the psychologist’s support.

5. Practise short, repeated interactions in real life until confidence builds and avoidance fades.

Early learning points you will hear reinforced are simple and powerful:

• Fearful predictions are often overestimates.

• Anxiety is uncomfortable yet time limited, and it reduces faster when you stay in the situation.

• Each small success compounds into lasting courage.

For practical steps you can use now, see our clinic blog on managing fear based behaviours in children.

How Parents Can Support Anxiety Treatment at Home

Parent actions make a meaningful difference. Programmes and guidance for Australian families consistently highlight the value of calm coaching, predictable routines, and gentle encouragement

toward brave behaviour [2][5][6]. Useful actions you can begin today include:

• Validate, then coach: name the feeling and your child’s strength. For example, “This feels scary, and you can do hard things.” [5]

• Practise bravery: follow the fear ladder from sessions and repeat small steps daily to build momentum [2][7].

• Praise effort, not only outcomes: notice tiny wins to strengthen motivation and confidence [5].

• Reduce unhelpful accommodation: answer reassurance seeking once, then redirect to the plan. Replace avoidance with small, supported exposures that feel safe enough to try [2][5].

• Model calm: show your coping skills, such as steady breathing, problem solving aloud, and balanced routines [6].

• Keep predictable routines: regular sleep, outdoor play, and mealtime rhythms lower background stress and give children a sense of safety and control [6].

These home strategies closely align with what your child practises in therapy, so progress is faster and more durable.

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FAQ: Common Questions About Child Anxiety Psychologists

What does a child anxiety psychologist do?

They assess anxiety type and severity, then deliver evidence based CBT with developmentally appropriate methods, including play based strategies when needed. Family participation is part of best practice so skills are used at home and school [2][3].

When should I seek professional help?

Seek help when worries persist for weeks, disrupt school or social life, or trigger physical symptoms like headaches or stomach aches. Early, guideline based CBT improves functioning and targets remission of the diagnosis [2].

How effective is anxiety treatment for kids?

CBT is the Australian guideline endorsed first line treatment. Across many trials, about 49% of children achieve remission at post treatment compared with no treatment. Effects are stronger when families practise skills between sessions [2][4].

What is the role of exposure, and is it safe?

Exposure means facing fears in small steps while practising coping skills. It is planned, collaborative, and matched to your child’s readiness. Australian guidance supports graded exposure inside CBT because it reduces avoidance and builds lasting confidence [2][3].

How can I help between sessions without making things worse?

Follow the plan from therapy, keep routines steady, praise effort, limit repeated reassurance, and model your own coping skills. These steps align with Australian family guidance and strengthen gains from CBT [2][5][6].

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At Nurtured Thoughts Psychology, our child anxiety psychologists provide tailored CBT with developmentally sensitive, play based strategies. We work closely with families to build practical routines, step by step exposure plans, and confidence that lasts. To discuss how we can support your child’s next steps, contact our team to arrange a consultation.

Disclaimer: This guide is general information, not a substitute for individual medical advice. Please consult your GP or specialist for personal care.

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References

[1] Lawrence, D., Johnson, S., Hafekost, J., Boterhoven de Haan, K., Sawyer, M., Ainley, J., & Zubrick, S. R. (2015). The mental health of children and adolescents: Report on the second Australian Child and Adolescent Survey of Mental Health and Wellbeing. Canberra, ACT: Australian Government Department of Health. Available at: https://www.health.gov.au/sites/default/files/documents/2020/11/the-mental-health-of-children-and-adolescents_0.pdf

[2] Melbourne Children’s Campus, Centre for Research Excellence in Childhood Adolescent and Family Mental Health. (2024). Evidence based clinical practice guideline for anxiety in children and young people, RACGP endorsed. Parkville, VIC: Murdoch Children’s Research Institute. RACGP landing page: https://www.racgp.org.au/clinical-resources/clinical-guidelines/guidelines-by-topic/view-all-guidelines-by-topic/paediatric-and-child-health/evidence-based-clinical-practice-guideline-for-anx

[3] Royal Children’s Hospital Melbourne. (2024). Clinical practice guidelines: Anxiety, identification and management. Melbourne, VIC: RCH. Available at: https://www.rch.org.au/clinicalguide/guideline_index/Anxiety__identification_and_management/

[4] James, A. C., Reardon, T., Soler, A., James, G., & Creswell, C. (2020). Cognitive behavioural therapy for anxiety disorders in children and adolescents. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, 2020(11), CD013162. Available at: https://www.cochranelibrary.com/cdsr/doi/10.1002/14651858.CD013162.pub2/full

[5] Royal Children’s Hospital Melbourne. (2024). Kids Health Info: Anxiety in children. Melbourne, VIC: RCH. Available at: https://www.rch.org.au/kidsinfo/anxiety/

[6] Emerging Minds, National Workforce Centre for Child Mental Health. (2023). Creating family routines to support children’s mental health. Adelaide, SA: Emerging Minds. Available at: https://emergingminds.com.au/resources/routines-creating-family-routines-to-support-childrens-mental-health/

[7] Raising Children Network. (2025). Anxiety, the stepladder approach for children and teenagers. East Melbourne, VIC: Raising Children Network. Available at: https://raisingchildren.net.au/toddlers/health-daily-care/mental-health/anxiety-stepladder-approach

[8] Ginsburg, G. S., Becker Haimes, E. M., Keeton, C., Kendall, P. C., et al. (2018). Results from the Child and Adolescent Anxiety Multimodal Extended Long Term Study, primary anxiety outcomes. Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 57(7), 471 to 480. PubMed: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29960692/